Yes, I also require giant robo-arms, in order to also build my giant fusion reactor.

Spiderman 2 is freaking hilarious. If you really like science, don't watch it, cause you'll be foaming at the mouth. If you like laughing at junk science (damn new-agers) Spiderman 2 is good for that.

Having a weeeeird, weeeeird, time. Sorta relaxed a bit more though. Thank god for that.

First time in a looong while I pulled a 4 hour night, fuck, I can cope far better than I thought I could. I am a sleepaholic is what I am. I've repaid all of that damn sleep debt and then some. Hoooray for dangerous behaviour.

Antonio Banderas covered in corn!

Chocolate...and Thom Yorke.

Glee! is for sale.

Tschuss!

Ah. Zen.

I so very much love that book.

Blogging after some grueling, grueling General maths work. Man, that stuff is hard. Calculus holds nuthin' to General. Not a friggin candle.

We have to go to this place!

I await my communist overlord! All hail our Dear Leader! Min-taec, you have to come along. You're both an asset and a liability (hurrah for business terminology!...or not) though...I wanna hear that our grain production has surpassed quota ...AGAIN! (actually happens on the radio frequencies over there) Omg, how much do we rock under Juche!

And a word of warning, that site is possibly one of the most creepy/outlandish i've visited. Read about the DMZ wall (Get to it by going to Info menu, then reading about reunification. This is a surprising meaty site for propoganda purposes. And when I mean meaty, I mean the phony sort of ersatz meat that you would probably get served if you were actually IN Communist Russia. Go figure.) Utterly hilarious/freaky shit.

HOWEVER:

Sometimes a cigar is in fact just a cigar, even in the Soviet Union.

I am working! like a mule! who wants to be fed! and who did feed upon the trough of ramen! Delicious ramen. I have work to do, which I am sorely neglecting. That is not good. Understand?! Good, good.

YEAR 9 CLOWNING! *uses the word compere/s for known reason*

Yeah, in joke.

Tschuss tschuss!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...Or so you think! Muhahahahahahahahahha *fades in smoke* notice something about the exclamation points?! Thas right!

heheheheheh...oh wait, i'm still here *exit, stage upward*

Heart Palpitating. Mouth tingling. Ear...hurting?

One my favourite fantasy books ever, which I have read A LOT of times, is being cast as a mini-series!!!

Here's to them NOT to fuck it up!

I have Spiderman 2 to watch! I gots it for frees! Yay for stupidity!

I had fun today. I did work today. It was good day. I have money! I don't know why! Whatever shall I do with it!

I search for The Corporation on Amazon.uk and I get...this.

And I quote:

"Darian Cane plays Eroticus, the leading general of Rome, one who achieves victory on the battlefield in her own special way, one that does not involve armor or weapons or even clothes. The emperor wants her to be the next leader of the Roman people, but the emperor's idiotic son assumes the throne after he sort of kills his father. He orders the death of Eroticus, but she defeats her would-be killers (who are, fortunately for her, female), and escapes only to be captured and taught the ways of lesbian gladiator fighting." Italics mine.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....hahahahahha. ha.

Nazis killed my parents, but I survived, thanks to my love of...ARCHITECTURE!

You: What's your reason for filching those Lifesavers!?
Me: I like Lifesavers?

Okay, lazy to do good post. So will talk in buzz/key words.

FEST! Back to blogging! Away from weird depression! Can be seen as good/bad! Work! Who needs sleep! Tentacles of Fire! More work! Jazz! Nice jazz! Moosic! Tired! MSN! Need Ideas! Decapitated rat head! Bitching! Yesness!

Tschuss!

Everything is everything (8)

I'm in love with Pancakes on the Rocks.

sumptuous. Utterly freaking sumptuous. Difficulty breathing. Mmmmm, pancakes...next time, have actual pancakes.

Social promiscuity...I'm divided on it. Fake talk, fake laughter, fake touch, fake life...Though, logically, it makes perfect sense. Fake from whose perspective bitch?

Certain things have cropped up, which I think I can deal with. I'm working on a process of having near perfect control over myself; lying is just so easy. Willpower is that other interesting part. Nearly there.

Anyway, Piscourse needs a girlfriend. Night...^^

Yeah it's political

But GO THE ANIMATION!

Coolness.

So it begins

with the madness known as the HSC.

Bush won the elections. These are definitely going to be interesting times.

Chucking sardonically at Arrested Development, sighing softly at my tired body, reveling in the coolness of interesting people and rethinking my ideas about 4U.

Stuff is happening! woo! ouch. Night night.

Florida called by everyone but Fox.

Ohio the next Florida. Ohio DAMN close. Fox called it before everyone. Fox called probably Bush, after calling Ohio. CNBC called Ohio after Fox, took some time.

Nader will be hated in Iowa. Very few votes separating Bush and Kerry in Iowa.

Bush winning the popular vote handily.

Ohio horribly close. All except but CNN give Ohio to Bush. Shite. Bush got it.

269 electoral votes if Ohio won. Means Bush definitely in office. Nevada, Iowa, New Mexico could push it beyond the 269.

Good note, clean election! Very few accounts of voter fraud, oppression, challenges.

Fox News calling Kerry President. Fox news again, calling Ohio for Kerry, even when they say it's for Bush.

Small increased majority in Senate and Reps, though already held majority.

Bush won.

And let the sun inside (8)

Watch the Lexus IF awards. Safran is hosting, and the word 'irreverent' was used in it's description.

Arrested Development ROCKS. Rocks to the chest, it is.

Some people just need to be backhanded. Others, not so much. and I like almonds. Elections! shizen. Tchuss

Pull my ribs apart (8)

Yayness for fun!

Decidedly, have had a lot of fun. I don't quite get how; but I don't regard that as particularly important. I spent ten minutes inside my house! woo. I missed Glass House! and Eat Carpet! nooooo...it was just not to be.

Really enjoyed Intimate Strangers. It was...nice. And they didn't fudge up the ending! yesness.

It's the first time that I can remember that I couldn't talk! AT ALL!! That's just insane...Cannot believe that.

Walk on by...(8)

Don't need sleep, yet I do.

Going oh so very crazy oh so very slowly. This wasn't in the schedule.

Got my bracelet back today, taught people how to think and generally proving that people suck. ok, not really, but they need to know that.

Think I will sleep even if I don't want and want to watch my beautiful beautiful AZUMANGA DAIOH, the opening song...it's so, so...*drips away in majesty*

So...i'm not the only one going crazy? Good to hear. And wouldya please quit it with the worry? I'm fine as is, and I don't need people to look into me. Go watch some anime or do something or something. Yeah.

My eyes hurt! It's weird. Nightio!

Surreal and tired.

I really shouldn't be blogging from this late at night. I should be sleeping.

I saw a dead cat today. It was fluffy. And cute. And lying on the side of the road. Dead. *bursts into fresh tears*

I thought you said you would tell me if I went insane! I got no notice of that! NONE! damn it, next time tell me if i'm invited to something.

Work lays ahead. Tchuss!

...

It's been a horrible day.

I lost Chicken. :(

Dammit, the New-agers are right. ...Very very jealous of these people.

It was a day which had weather.

(The title is cause I couldn't remember what the weather was like today, and I wanted to do those 'it was a dark and stormy night' crap)

It started out nicely. It promised to be a goodish day. I did my work. I didn't annoy too many people. I was much too selfish. Sex is annoying. Damn German kid. Ancient is cool! mmmm, political intrigue and mischief! Goodness.

I came home with work to do. Little did I know the arduous task that lay forth before me. See, people, this is why friends are a problem. A gratuitous problem which must be eliminated! *ahem* I mean, woo! Go friendship! Antics mentions them, must be good, right?

WRONG.

nah, right.

Piskorz was an epic. 5 hours. It took over 5 freaking hours. I hate to say it like this now, I like him too much. There is nothing as physically tiring and draining as a emotional duel. But I did it. I got through it. Slowly, oh so slowly, teasing, coaxing, playing, sometimes rough, sometimes sweet, sometimes nice...God I wish I were describing sex. It was quite satisfying though. I think that's how sex should be though. It would be great.

I can't believe it. There's post-angst. There actually is. This fricken counts as my therapy experience. If this is what sessions are like, I will be ROLLING IN IT.

Then, after that, he realises what an ass he was. *eye twitches, leading to irregular blinking*

I deserve labu. and sex..u.

how was your day?>
'

Lasers!

Akira was coolness! Sub-Orbital Laser!

Dave Barry is quitting. I'm going into mourning.

Had a goodish day today, fricken tired, yet managed to keep up myself awake and ready, and was cheered up only in that way that spending times with friends can. Sorry for being so mean. I didn't mean it :(

But yeah, I have a freaking lot of work to do! damn it, it's not too hard but still! It was a smart move to drop out of ancient. I have to read a FUCKLOAD of stuff and summarise it. Crazy.

Anyway, off to learn more French and do work! Au revoir and a bientot!

Finally

A solution to the homosexual problem.

Among others:

"Marriage is not sacred. Marriage is for wimps and sissies!"

"Polygamy fell out of favor! Women were no longer mere pieces of property belonging to men! Next these uppity women demanded the right to vote! Families could no longer own slaves! ... Where will it all end? Will history never cease to unfold?"

Having a...very interesting week. It's really quite odd. People, stuff, French, more stuff...really weird. Should be good though.

Lain is so artsy. What the hell? Eh, bye bye.

S'ok.

Really best way to describe it.

Why is Google Desktop being distributed as a torrent?

Ciao.

More delicious, nutritious quotes!

Mr Morris is so bitter:

" Recently, we had an election. Bunch of clowns! Well, some of them atleast. Don't have much time for politics."

"5 years ago, I said that we would be accessing the Internet through our phones. But they didn't listen to me, did they!? "

Funny stuff:

Again, Mr Morris: " In Communist Russia, they had little plots in their backyard where they grew some vegetables and hogs, or pigs as they call them over there. "

Read on the back seat of a bus: " Being gay is gay. "

Heard on a cartoon (X-men, if you must know): " Did you hear that?! It sounded like an explosion! "

In my English class:
Motherwell: " Some women turn to HRT to combat menopause. "
Student: Holden Racing Team!

On the Chaser Decides (which you all should be watching avidly! AVIDLY!) : " It's such a waste of paper giving out those how to vote forms. Especially those how to vote Democrat forms. "

And last, beauty: " Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion. "

Screwed it up a bit with the Korz!, really should have been more sensitive. No real damage though. Just my reputation :P Eh. You take of it min-taec.

Sleep!

EDITO (pronounced ehh-di-toh) : Wah!? Edelstein loves it. Ebert hates it.


Guess which movie. Utterly freaky.

Neurotic

Inspiration.

There's some things needed to be said. Yes, needed. I'll get to it, I think.

I had a nice, long talk psychology wise with min-taec. There was no motivation for this. In fact, that's been an overriding factor in most of my recent life. Some people have incredibly strong backbones, reliance, strong as a rock. I go the other way. Completely and utterly weak, a wisp to be blown around, gently if possible, enjoying whatever comes through. There's always more to this, though. But you know that already don't you?

YAB is...fun. YAB is nice. YAB is just YAB. Don't make any distinctions about it. I've understood it's occupants. It's an interesting world. I don't really want much of a part of it. You know how I work, individuals, not groups. The only way I value groups is for the precious, beautiful way you don't have to talk much. You listen. You hear and understand, comprehend. You don't have to talk though. I don't like responsibility much.

You should have noticed. Yes, I have been distant from everyone for a while. I've finally committed myself to that oath that I would not hurt my friends. Whether I do this out of love or some other arcane reaction is suspect. If this means that I have to omit the truth, fudge it, evade or outright lie, I am willing to do it. It means too much to myself not to.

Yeah, it's probably right that it would probably be very unlikely to whom I could relate. I wish I could find that person. I wish that I could love that person, and they love me. I mean really love. Love so deep and strong that it makes my heart hurt. Love so deep and strong that it makes my heart hurt all the time. Love so strong that it makes you reel and stagger. It already does. The thing is, I thought/think that I found that person. But I don't believe I understand love. I don't know enough, I haven't experienced enough love in my life to realise what it is. Do you need to? To quote the Flips, what does it matter?

But yet, this poses a problem. Having such a yearning, such a love for a person, it burns inside you. This fire burns ragged holes inside of you, charred-edges of a scarred landscape. It hurts abominably; it doesn't matter. It's not like it's a bad thing. You want to fill that void. Music. Art. Humour. Pain. Beauty. Remember my earlier point about the wisp? Not being beholden to something means that I can't really let myself into it. I can't just let something overtake me, overwhelm me and give me release. Salvation. All those things last for a while. A while only though. Basically meaning your entire meaning of life is constructed by distraction.

I've seen writing that absolutely overwhelms me. Seeing such beauty, such...emotion. Just pure emotion, conveyed so beautifully it moves me to laughter and tears. I wish I could so such a thing. Or the other way around. So perfectly constructed that everything is ordered nicely. This, this, this and then this. Dot points. Numbers. Alphabetised. I wish I could lay everything out like that too. Or either.

I don't mind being alone anymore. I don't see what's so bad about it. I've learnt to enjoy things. I've also learnt to let go. That's the scary part. I wonder how far I can let go. For a good while recently, i've been very suicidal. It was a long-term thing. A project. Declassify myself from existence. No longer a member of a family. No longer a member of the human race. No longer a friend. Go slowly. Alienate everyone. End of year 12, do a angsty piece, leave. Perfect. I realised it was pointless. By my own self-contempt, interestingly.

Ultimately, I may initiate a plan soon that would lead to my eventual downfall. Grandiose words indeed. It would work. I'll die from it, but hey i've had a good run. Life being life showed me that. Maybe I won't start it. Maybe i'll never start it. Do you really want to bet on that?

To summarise: To anyone and everyone who reads this blog, you may NOT ask me questions on my family life. On my personal life. Or my emotions. These three things shit me beyond belief. I absolutely hate these three things. I am not dealing with them. That is how I work. I influence, certainly, not outright deal though. Please don't worry about me.

I'm sorry. I know i've broken things here. But I do believe that truth in small doses is good for you. Atleast that's the way I see this truth.

Also! I can't believe I am saying this, but Christianity helped me plug up a hole I had in one of my theories that i've had for a while and discussed only a little. Okay it wasn't Christ, it was one of his followers. And really it was an accident. And now that I think about it, not a hole, just another argument ^^

Enough of this long post, i'd feel safer if you sorta overlooked it ^^. So will do shifty covert thing. Tchuss!

Nothing's wrong, I'm just fine, i've realised I just don't like jokes...(8)

Feel like a longish post today, sated after a good bowl of ramen.

Fact one: Never, ever, get in the way of a ramen addict when they have not had ramen for a while.

Fact two: I am such a person.

Fact three: I am however, easily placated by random Asian snacks involving wafers and nutella. mmmm.

I've got to think a lot of stuff out. That sentence should explain things.

Day of election: Why did my dad vote for Howard?

First day of election: Nothing seems different. The world hasn't stopped spinning. Everything seems to be the way it was....Damn.

Second day of election: See first day.

First day of school: Disorientating, to say the least. Did well in eco. Did alright in english. Did alright in business. Heat was baaaaaad. Listened to lots of music. Beck is just SEXY.

Forming networks is HARD. It's even worse when you've got to readjust to the different sleeping patterns, lack of eating patterns, school, and the general idiocy and obnoxiousness of people. I really forgot about that.

The holidays have thrown me off. I've got to realign goals, readjust some of the mood swings, readapt eating, sleeping, thinking, life patterns, lotsa of pointless crap. And please, spare me the humanity. It's degrading.

Piskorz, or peesh-corshe as i've dubbed him seems like an interesting character. He seems to have emotional depth, but seems unable to understand it? deal with it? I sorta feel like manipulating him to the point of opening him up, but nah. That's risky as is, and i'm not really in the mood to put myself through torture again.

I'm finding it very hard to joke around people now. I mean real joking, not some faux-joke crap to satisfy people. There's only a few people left. I dunno, i'm sure there's more, and it's a lot more complex than I make it out to be, but from this little viewpoint, that's how it is.

Thankfully, made up my mind on almost everything. Might not be the right decisions, might not be the wrong ones, but hey, there is no such thing as right and wrong, right?

Everything interconnects.

Otherwise, let's see how the rest of life plays out, live whatever you can, and au revoir! Zorrolie shall save us all.